Approval vs Obedience (scattershooting muse)

Ok, so here's a new one (meaning I'm not copying out of my past)...

I struggle daily with this concept that comes from Galatians 1:10 - "Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ." Now hear me out, I'm about to take this verse out of the context in which Paul was writing it. I'm going to expand it to my everyday struggle with trying to obey God and at the same time trying to live with approval from man.

Today, I was asked to spend 2-3 minutes and open our staff up in a prayer time. So my inner conversation goes wild with thoughts of making that time cool and great (video clip, favorite song, etc)...so that folks pat me on the back and say, "good job today." My competitive side overtakes my obedience side of walking humbly before my God. So I continually ask myself, how do you do both?

I don't know...so I pray. And as simple as that sounds, I think that's what God calls us to do. If we are in prayer, which is communing with our Creator, our hearts affection is re-directed from me to Him. I pray James 1...for wisdom that only God can give. I pray Ephesians 1...that He "may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know Him better." I pray Psalm 100..."Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth...For the Lord is good and His love endures forever; His faithfulness continues through all generations." I pray 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18...continually and without ceasing.

Sound familiar...it's also referred to as worship. Woe is me when I place idols (which often includes my self and thoughts of what others will think of me) before my God. The thing that I must then do in obedience is pray these same passages over others. God, through the Holy Spirit, will not cease in giving me names of people to pray for. If I were to give Him my entire day, He would gladly fill my thoughts with names of those in my circle of life to lift up to Him.

How is this Approval vs Obedience? Looking back at Paul's statement...I now can look at those people that I live life with and know that I'm not speaking to them in order to impress them, but I'm speaking to them knowing that the Spirit within me has lifted them up to our Father. In obedience I'm now doing what the Lord has required of me, not for their approval, but as a steward of what the Lord has given/done for me!

If you've read this whole thing, you might be saying, "I sure liked the old, thought out stuff better." To which I reply, "bless you!"

Marriage (2001)

Two major events happened in my life between 2000 - 2001. I married Simri in November 2000, and then my parents divorced in 2001 after 30+ years of marriage. Needless to say, that was a rollercoaster year of emotions. I wrote this journal immediately after hearing of my parents situation. That event created a burning desire to study God's Word on Love, Marriage, and Divorce. Here's what I wrote on marriage...

Marriage - the joining of two to become one. So how does two distinct creations of God become one? What is created by God (the man and woman...and the joining in marriage) must therefore be given by God. Does that mean God will distinctly show you who to marry? In some cases in the Bible, the answer is "yes," but He spends more time discussing the committment between a man and a woman than the seeking of a mate. The committment came down to a direct comparison of Jesus and the Church (the Word made Flesh and God's chosen people). We are commanded to love as Christ loved the Church...in which He gave His life for them.

Here enters the term "love," along with a great definition of the word: "willing to die for." How does a man and woman discover they are "willing to die for" the other? Looking once again to Scripture, we see that God knows man is not very willing to lay his own life down for another man (Rom 5:7). But if we look to our heroes throughout history, we find that most of them became heroes by laying down their lives for man or country. So did our Lord (Rom 5:8). He gave His life so we might live...and also do likewise. His example is our goal. Just as His life, death, and resurrection is the key to our salvation.

This page of journaling was one that I read and prayed over many times over the past 7 years. I pleaded with God to teach me how to love Simri in marriage. I also pleaded with God to give my parents a love that they may never have known...His love in marriage. What would give Him more glory than for my parents to reconcile and depend on Him to provide love? Well, He provided a miracle and 7 years later, my parents re-united in marriage. All Praise to God!

unStupid (Sept 2004)

Freedom by ignorance is not the way God intended us to live. Nor does He desire us to take His word and twist it so that we can live how we want to live. He gave us His word so that we could have wisdom far beyond worldly understanding. He gave us His word so that our desires begin to reflect His ways.

Set Apart (Sept 2004)

Set apart. What exactly does that look like? Obviously Jesus is the perfect example of being set apart. He came and walked among us where He was daily tempted yet He sinned not. So if we believe that, why do we point the finger at Him anytime our actions are questioned. "Well, Jesus turned water to wine, so He must drink" or "He got so angry that He destroyed all of the merchants tables and stuff in the temple." Have we become so indignent that we can't admit when we make unwise choices? I know the task of purity and holiness seems way to far away from my grasp, but could God be teaching me thru baby steps how to live a life that is set apart? If I read His word more often and listened to the guidance of the Holy Spirit would I be able to live justly and not justify the way I live? When the faithful men of God said "Woe is me" or "chief am I of sinners" they didn't follow it with "but look at him" or "well that's just forcing his religious convictions on me." They were admiting their sin and seeking to be more like Christ...more like their creator and Father desired them to be. Holy Spirit, please continue to convict me and teach me. Father, don't allow my heat to be so hardened that I don't seek Your way in all I think, do, and say. Jesus, thank you for living Truth. Thank you for taking the burden I've created and nailing it to the cross where it no longer lives. Please forgive me when I neglect Your joy in suffering for us. Show me how to experience that kind of joy.

The Start

Ok, I started a blog a couple years ago with one posting...now I can't even remember the name of my blog...or how to even find it. So, I'm starting anew...sorta. By the way, I sometimes use a lot of "..." when I'm rambling...so please forgive me! I say sorta to the starting anew because I'm actually going to start with some old journals that I've written. I hope that gives me something to roll with. If you're reading this, you probably should blog less because that means you really spent a lot of time finding this blog. Haha. My prayer is that God blesses you as only He can!